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Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Firefighters, Dogs, and Madrugadores

Yes Virginia, There Are Talking Cars
As you can figure out from the picture, Jack went as a firefighter this year.  Majestad found him this rock solid outfit, complete with huge metal clasps on the jacket and coverall bibs with knee patches.  The lid looked pretty good, too, albeit more 1970s fire dude than present day.  No oxygen tanks, though.  Bummer.

We did Trunk or Treat at church this year, which is kind of the logistical next step in Halloween laziness.  (I'm a huge fan.)  Jack's favorite attraction wasn't the candy; it was the car our friends fixed up to look just like Lightning McQueen from Cars.  Jack just stared, in complete shock, like he was thinking, "I KNEW HE WAS REAL!  I KNEW IT!"  He spent the rest of the night demanding to see Lightning's motor.

Speaking of Pixar, each car/family in the lot kind of did their own thing, and my absolute personal favorite was the guy dressed up like Steve Jobs.  The dude is a dead ringer (sorry, couldn't help that) for Jobs.  It's freaky.  I go to shake his hand, and I get the Namaste greeting, his palms together, the whole thing.  Said he was unveiling his newest product:  iApples.  They were, of course, real apples lined up on the shelf behind him.  You have to respect the guy that goes all-in on the sight-gag.

The next night, we slowly toured our neighborhood, trying to lure folks to their doors to give me Jack candy.  Turns out that Halloween is an official dog holiday as well, because all the pooches hit the doors running, barking and swarming all over Jack as he nervously declared, "I'm okay.  I'M OKAY!"  The pups probably were hopped up on candy.  Hey, who wasn't?  Anyway, the rest of the night, he forgot his lines and began asking people about their current pet situation.

Conversation of the Week (Tie)
Think classifying people as either adults or chillrun is easy?  Think again.
Jack:  "Daddy's a child."
H.M.:  "No, Daddy's an adult."
Jack:  "I'm an adult."
H.M.:  "No, you are a child."  (To me as I leave to go back to work) "Bye, babe.  See you tonight."
Jack:  "Daddy's a babe."
Er, um, thanks.
Jack:  (Walking into the grocery store) "That signs says H-E-B.  That spells H-E-B, Mommy."
He just said that because he can't say "redundancy."

The Very Latest In Unexpected Parenting Dilemmas
Each morning, Jack used to (mercifully) stay in his room until somebody went and collected him.  But after our vacation (in eastern time) and then with the time change itself, he busts into our room at painfully early hours.  So you'll hear a door slam, and 4.7 seconds of thundering footfalls later, he arrives yelling "Mommy!" or "Daddy!" at the top of his lungs, talking incessantly.  It's my pet theory that the body wakes in sections.  In his case, his legs and mouth are working several minutes before the brain strolls in.

This needs to be solved well before February.  We'll now be taking your suggestions.  The phone lines are now open.

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